Very hurtful marriage situation, long question, please help?

That's your choice, but I would have given up at the point he declared I was only important to him as a source of healthcare - and it sounds to me like you think maybe you should have, too. You're only 24. You've got plenty of time left to find someone who likes you as you are and doesn't try to blame you for his own commitment issues. Personally, I wouldn't waste any more of it on your loser of a husband.